“Just Do Your Best” Love, Mom/Dad/Coach
“All that matters to us is that you do your best”.
It sounds good.
I would guess 98% of parents recite these words to their child at some point during their academic and/or athletic developmental journey. However some parents do not think about the fact that words mean nothing if they are not backed by action.
This is a short, simple, sweet reminder to show that you really do value effort over results (and evaluated effort- which is making sure you are giving effort in the right areas and towards the right things).
I believe evaluated effort should be the focus as the coach or parent, because at the end of the day, effort is one of the only things within your control.
How to mess this up:
1. Freak out. Over ANYTHING. It's the quickest way to get your athlete to shut down and never share anything with you. Even if it is BAD, do not freak out.
2. Show your frustration with refs (this shows you care A LOT about the outcome of the game)
3. Make your first question something statistical: “How many points did you score? Did you win?"
4. Ask your athlete in a way that sounds interrogating, “I noticed that play you messed up, what happened?”
5. Give your athlete technical and tactical tips and reminders before, during, or after the game (shows you are emotionally invested in their on-field performance)
6. School related: get bent out of shape and react over the grade before digging deeper and pondering the question yourself, “Why?”
7. Change your facial expressions, attitude, or tone of voice when your kid doesn’t start, get playing time, or perform well
Dedicated to our youth’s success,
P.S. I'm curious. Do any of these apply to you or someone you know?
If you don't mind, share this on Facebook. Maybe, just maybe, one or two other parents or coaches will see it and experience some enlightenment.